A view of Psychotherapy from the perspective of
both patient and therapist.
In 1979 I first went to see a Psychotherapist. It followed
the retirement of my original colleague in my business
Communication Improvements. Since it's foundation in 1974 I
had worked with him on an exclusive basis. His name was
Henry Davidson, he was 23 years my senior, but also acted
for five years as mentor and guru. I realised without his
insight into people, the business would be much poorer and
I needed to improve mine. I had first come into contact
with therapy via him and his wife who was at the time a
Jungian Child Psychotherapist who had trained with
Winnicott. My first five years in therapy was therefore
naturally with a Jungian. At this point I was sufficiently
immersed and involved that I decided I wanted to be a
therapist. I thought this would be a very good occupation
for later in life. At the start of the training, to widen
my experience of therapy I changed to a Freudian and spent
the next four years of my training in a Freudian therapy.
Following that I moved back to another Jungian for a year
and then finally moved onto a therapist specialising in the
Transpersonal and Psychosynthesis. Thus over an 18 year
period I had four very different therapists.
Therapy was not so much 'needed' but became a way of life.
Fortunately having a successful business I was both able to
afford it in time and money terms. Indeed having the
business allowed me a great deal of time for study and the
very long 7 year training before I finally qualified in
1992. I had begun practice with 'Training Patients' in 1987
and continued in practice until 2002, some fifteen years. I
completed more than 10,000 hours as a therapist and saw
more than 200 patients for differing lengths of time over
that period. The longest I worked with any one individual
was 7 years.
Being a Jungian at heart if not by training which was
eclectic, I tended to mainly work with dreams. In over
twenty I recorded more than 10,000 dreams of my own. That
was, and still is in my view, the very best therapeutic
path to follow, provided you have a therapist who really
works with and understands how dreams work.
However my views of therapy and therapists have changed
over the years as my experience grew and widened.
Let me first of all give a perspective from the patient's
viewpoint. Being a patient in Psychotherapy is not easy. It
requires dedication, commitment, hard work, time and money.
You enter either because in the main you are either
courageous (the few) or desperate (the many). The majority
of people hope for a 'quick fix', little realising to 'be
in therapy' properly is several years work. I always
reckoned around 4-5 years to completion for most people,
never less than three, and for a few even more time was
needed. Of course occasionally dramatic insights and
turnarounds are accomplished in one session or a few
sessions, but this is extremely rare. Then there is of
course the question of which therapist to see, and with
what particular persuasion. I always stayed with the
therapist I went to until that part of the work was
complete, with a single exception where the lengthy travel
proved counter productive. However often people 'try' a
variety of therapists, hoping to find the right one. I
believe it is more than likely the first one you went to.
The key thing I learned from going to different therapists,
particularly in the early years was that it helped
distinguish what was the therapist's stuff and what was
mine. Leaving the first therapist after five years, I felt
very spiritual, but gradually as I immersed myself in a
Freudian therapy with a very different outlook, I realised
some the ideas I had were not necessarily mine, but my
previous therapist's. Naturally in an intense relationship
like therapy, you pick up some thoughts and ideas from your
therapist, however non-interventionist they are. Again over
the years my views on this aspect of therapy changed
substantially. I concluded eventually that to be paid a lot
of money and sit and say almost nothing, was for the
patient a rip off. Why were people coming and paying good
money for your wisdom and experience if you were not
prepared to share it with them??!! This idea in many
therapy circles remains heresy! Many therapists consider
saying as little as possible the only way to work, but
whether this provides good value to the patient is I think
a highly debateable point!
In 1999, I took a sabbatical from therapy and on my journey
discovered The Landmark Forum (see button above, Courses
2). This proved a revelation and after a weekend's
immersion I realised my vision of the world which had been
finally formed around the age of 42 and held firm until I
was 56 had to be revised. In fact the world view I had on
which most of my therapy work had been founded was revised
and realigned. I decided that for 80-90% of the patients
who came into therapy, the Forum was probably a much
quicker, cheaper, more powerful alternative. Indeed at that
time I encouraged seven of the eight patients I then had,
to go on it and for all bar one, it was a transformative
experience, which changed their lives as much as it had
mine. Indeed the speed of the work we were able to do as a
result improved immensely. These days if people seek my
advice on therapy, my first thought is 'go on the Forum
first' then see if you need it.
That is not to say Psychotherapy doesn't work. It does, it
deepens and broadens anyone who seriously enters into it.
But it is far from easy and needs a willingness to really
look at yourself in depth. The danger is that Psychotherapy
itself becomes a solution to the problems that continue to
be avoided. "Oh, I'm in therapy" is not an answer. It is a
tool, to help you deal with the practical problems of life.
Too often, the comfort of this strange and unusual
relationship, once established, can be used to avoid
actually having to do anything about the real problems
patients come with. Thus these days I tend to feel a more
confrontative and direct approach like the Forum, is
actually an advantage for many people, who might otherwise
wallow in the therapy room.
As a therapist it was a tremendously challenging job.
However the organisation and administration of therapy in
the UK is a complete mess and the quality of organisation
and management available is extraordinarily poor. Thus
there is no dependable organisation you can rely upon.
Equally with the explosion in Counselling, much of it with
poor quality and inadequate training, has resulted in a
huge growth where there are far too many Counsellors for
the number of patients available. It is not a business in
which you can earn significant sums of money unless you
have an exclusive London practice and work long hours. The
costs of training and your own therapy are substantial, I
reckon it at £15-20,000! The rewards pretty poor.